Thursday, November 2, 2017

It's ok to cry

Oh sweet girl. Tonight I held you as you cried. You sobbed. As if your heart was breaking, which probably is pretty accurate. my heart hurts for you. For the pain and horrible reasons for why you have to be in our home. We are glad you are; glad we can keep you safe right now. But I'd be scared just like you if id been taken out of the only home I'd know even, even if it was done to keep me safe, from being hurt. Oh sweet girl, how I wish I could take your fear and hurt away. I pray out loud, hoping it might bring peace to the tangled mix of emotions. You can't really express anything verbally except to say "I miss home". What does home mean to you? What about "home" do you miss? I wish I could see what you picture in your mind. Do you see past the pain and imagine it to be what you want it to be instead? Do you push back the pain of feeling unsafe and see the only version of family you've ever known?
You barely know me, but you still cling to me at every turn throughout the day today, never letting me out of your sight. As these sobs wrack your tiny little body, you cling to my neck wanting to be held. I sing to you songs of a savior who loves you. Do you know He does? Do you know that no matter how skewed your idea of a father is, God is the safest father you could ever know.
Oh sweet girl I'm so sorry. Sorry that you weren't protected. Sorry that you at your young age had to already protect your little brother. Sorry that we live in a fallen world and I can't fix it all for you. I'm sorry you're scared. I'm sorry your heart hurts.
It's ok to cry sweet girl. Let all those tears flow. Not one will be wasted. You may not understand now, but I pray one day you will. I pray that you will understand how valuable you are, that you have amazing worth. You are created in God's image. Beautiful and perfect in His sight.
You barely know me, but I love you already.
It's ok to cry. It will help you sleep tonight. You'll become too tired to worry or be scared. Let the tears fall as your eyes give way to sleep. Rest tonight knowing you are safe. No one will hurt you tonight. You are safe in my arms tonight sweet girl.
Tonight you are safe. It's ok to cry.

Monday, May 19, 2014

Counting down to Court!!!!

John 14:27 "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."

Friday we have our court hearing to finalize Ruthie's adoption! Her legal name is already Ruth Joy Kroeker (a very special gift from her wonderful birthmother), but this will mean that legally the state recognizes us as her parents! She's been our daughter from the moment that S placed her in our arms, but this means no figurative looking over the shoulder! 

Before Friday can take place, our lawyer needs to receive a couple certificates & affidavits to verify that we've exhausted all avenues of contacting birth father.  The certificates have all been received, but we're still waiting the affidavit from the independent counsel who's verifying it all.  If it's received by Thursday we are all set for our hearing! 

Prayer requests:

* Please pray that all necessary documents are received by Thursday so we don't have to postpone our court hearing.

* Please continue to pray for S (birthmother) as she has started a new chapter in her life. She's decided it's best for her to have some space for a while, and we're supportive of her in that. Please pray for her as her heart still is going through different emotions at different moments. She's an amazingly strong woman.

Thank you!!! We're so blessed to have you all praying for us!!!

The Kroekers!

Our girl is all smiles!!! She started grinning at us at 6 weeks old! We love it!

Sister love!! Karis just adores being a big sister!

Family time at our favorite type of venue! The zoo!!!

Mother's Day with my girls!

Friday, April 4, 2014

She's here!!!!!

We are proud to announce that our daughter Ruth Joy Kroeker is here!  Ruthie was born Thursday March 27th at 8:08PM!! Labor and delivery went well and birthmom did amazingly!! After 24 hours in the hospital we were able to bring our precious baby girl home! Karis is such a proud big sister & we are thrilled to be parents of two beautiful, happy girls!! We are home and settling into life as a family of 4. Thank you all for all your prayers and encouragement during the past year and half we've been praying for this baby!

Cheyenne, Alison, Karis & Ruthie

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Waiting Still

So, with all the anticipation of an upcoming due date and anticipated baby arrival, we now have to wait again! :)

This week our birthmom had her weekly doctor appointment.  Her OB went over all her sonograms and charts and determined that we've still got a couple more weeks to wait for this baby girl to arrive! Good news is that both S and baby girl are healthy and baby is growing just as she should!

The good news is, birthmom is much less anxious about when this baby is going to be born! She was so worried about going too far past her due date, but now her perspective is that of peace! That in itself is a big praise!!

Please continue to pray for S and baby!!! :)

Good things are worth the wait!!!!

Tuesday, March 11, 2014

And still we wait!

Here we are, just a few days away from our perspective due date and we are daily practicing patience!!! :)

I'm still in daily contact with S and she is about as anxious and ready for this baby girl to be born as we are! She's very uncomfortable and baby is running out of room as she continues to grow!

Much prayer has been covering this entire adoption and all involved. We are so thankful for your prayers. Thank YOU! Some days we are so filled with peace, and other days we NEED your prayers to feel that peace. 

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Any day now

Our precious little girl is due in 10 days and has already gotten us jumping at a moments notice! :)
We are remaining excited and hopeful that this is the baby that God has picked out for us!

Last weekend we through she was getting ready so we made the drive down to where S lives so we were close! There was a big storm heading our way and we didn't want to get snowed in and not make it just in case!!! Turns out we got a good practice run in and still have to wait!!

But continue waiting we must because baby girl is taking her sweet time!! She's growing and healthy and content in the womb for now!

We're ready and anxious, but trusting that as we wait, God is continuing to prepare our hearts to bring home this precious baby girl and working in our birthmother's heart as she prepares to make a very difficult, brave decisions.

All is going great! I (Alison) am talking and texting with S daily and getting to know more about her. Sharing stories about our kids (she has a couple already), talking about favorite foods, and learning a bit about each other. S says daily that she's confident in her choice of an adoption plan. She wants us super involved and has asked that we be at the hospital when baby is born and care for baby while at the hospital! We are excited! And aren't taking any of this for granted.

Please continue praying for S and baby as time for delivery gets close!

The BIG Announcement!!!! ....before the biggest one! :)

GOD is SOOOOOO Good!!!!!!!!!!! But of course we knew that already! :) He always is. Always good, always faithful, always knowing exactly what we need & when we need it.

Philippians 4:19 "And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus."

This is TRUE! We've always known this to be true, and today we revel in it!!!!


An amazing praise came this week through some very very special people in our lives! We've received a grant from a foundation that will cover our finalization costs!!!!!! This means that unless any surprise costs arise we have raised/saved every penny we need for our adoption costs!!!!!!!! PRAISE THE LORD who provides all things!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We have reached our fundraising goal!!!!!!! We've raise all of the $28,000 that we need for our adoption!!!

It's the strangest feeling knowing that we've reached our goal. No more working extra for my hubby, no more grant writing or petitioning for, no more garage sales, no more creative fundraisers! God has provided ALL we need!!!

Psalm 23:1 is one of my favorite verses: "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want."

Another way to say it is: The Lord is my shepherd; I have all I need". Everything we need God provides.

We can never ever in a million years thank each of you who've partnered with us enough for how grateful we are to you! We know many of you sacrificed in order to help us and we don't take that lightly. Our hearts are overwhelmed with gratitude! THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!